29 thus far...

Another year, another bout of disappointments.

Here are some things that I've realized/done/thought/etc in this first month:

1. Realized that Gossip Girl never wanted the idea of a speak easy to die...and beat the idea to death.

2. Am I stuck in my job for the rest of my life?

3. My iphone doesn't want me to online date. It actually refuses to let programs work. Thanks Siri, but please God, don't let me end up alone forever.

4. Apartment hunting hurts my brain. Who knew it would be so hard to find a place I can afford and then to have people want to take my money.

5. In the same vein...how does one break up with a broker?

6. I was meant to wear expensive clothing, I just don't have the money for it yet.

7. According to one of my best friends, I'm going to be her last shot at being a rich friend if I marry someone as she said "completely not my type" and is counting on me for future summer house visits. ha

8. I've been falling asleep on my couch a little too often for even my own taste.

9. I have bones that are worse than any person I've ever met and more severe than my own grandmother. 

10. I'm really dreading peeing in a "toxic waste" bucket for a day. I'm not kidding. This is in reference to #9.

11. $25 dollars doesn't pay for the tears 9 &10 have caused or will cause

12. more often than not, I have this very strong desire to just disappear and move to some random rural town and be an artist of some sort. 

13. If I committed to #12, where do I go? What do I do?

14. Where are normal guys?

15. No, seriously...where are normal guys?

16. Why on earth am I still ALWAYS cold?

Mulling over these thoughts in addition to so many others that my brain is in a perpetual state of ache.

Best,

me